Reading Borough Council look set to approve the redevelopment of Kings Meadow Baths. The Edwardian swimming pool has been lying derelict for years and the council have been looking for a developer to take over the grade II listed building.

Graham Hoskin, councillor for culture and sport, said: "Both plans on the table still need further development, but we can't put off making a decision for much longer. If it falls down whilst were still in charge of it we could get sued for neglecting our duties. We've now been waiting over 5 years for a mysterious fire to come to our rescue and it's bloody annoying that one hasn't turned up yet. They've had enough time."

Local Lib Dems have been blamed for the decision by Guardian Media Group to cut back the Reading Evening Post to just two editions per week.

A company statement said: "After the Lib Dems slashed Reading Borough Council's publicity budget for the next year, we had serious doubts on how the paper was going to be able to fill its copy with a drastic reduction on fatuous quotes from lead councillors to print. It makes the whole operation untenable."

A source close to the paper told us: "We'll have our revenge on the Lib Dems. If they thought being relegated to having a 'Second Person' piece on the council tax budget was bad, wait until we start putting all their press releases in 24Seven. No-one reads that!"

Martin Salter's email to his close friends and supporters telling them of his long suspected abdication threw up a large list of people who probably wished that the technophobe had learned to use BCC.

From the email:

"I wanted to thank everyone who made it along to my ‘Anniversary Bash’ at South Street the other week"

"I will be leaving Reading West with a strong team of Labour councillors in place and a healthy majority to defend at the next election."

And the people Martin Salter thinks would be pleased to receive a message from him telling them of his leaving a strong team of Labour councillors includes...

Due to the adverse weather conditions, Reading Borough Council has announced a complete u-turn in policy.

A council spokesperson told us: "Up until now we have been fully signed up to preventing climate change. However, in order to save money we have been reducing the amount of salt and grit stocks year by year and more than five day's snow is enough to exhaust them completely and bring the town to a stand still.

"We will therefore be cancelling all climate change initiatives and asking residents to turn up their heating, cancelling insulation grants and converting our fleet of vehicles to use more polluting types of diesel. Sorry polar bears, we have budgets to balance."

The Local Labour Party Are Fully Behind Peter Ruhemann

"I do so under the pressure of a voting majority and nothing else. You bastards arrrggghhhh!"

Reading's child protection services have been graded "inadequate" in a damning report from OfSted. However, the Labour council have welcomed the finding that once again as services under their care are already at rock bottom, the only way is up.

Lead councillor for children’s service Pete Ruhemann said: "Let's hope that the local press don't start looking into this damning report on child care in Reading and linking the death of Baby-P despite being on the at risk register with the death in Reading of Child-T despite being on the at risk register or I'll really be in trouble. If you think I'll be following the lead of Liz Santry, Haringey's Cabinet member for children and young people, by resigning, think again."

 Reading Local Safeguarding Children Report into Child T

Rob Wilson has stepped into the row over Reading Borough Council's LIVE Reading magazine. The council rag which managed 17 mentions of Labour councillors in the run up to last year's local elections will cost £56,020 in the coming year – a rise of more than 30 per cent, mainly due to a fall in advertising revenue from the local Labour Party.

Rob Wilson complained: "This is why I believe the council should take a metaphorical leaf out of Boris’ book by scrapping the mag and replacing it with a tree planting programme across the borough, and maybe shagging a few journalists for good measure whilst we're at it. Go Boris!"

A council spokesperson defended the magazine. "This is a much more cost effective way to communicate with residents than producing a raft of separate leaflets containing former leader David Sutton's telephone number instead of the elected councillor's."

Meanwhile tax payers have hit back at the Reading East MP by asking Rob Wilson to save thousands more trees by scrapping his "Parliamentary Reports" sent to every home in the constituency in increasing frequency near elections paid for out of the snouts in the trough Parliamentary allowances.

Reading Borough Council has proudly issued a press release for receiving a whole one star rating from the Commission for Social Care Inspection after a review of its provision for elderly and disabled adults.

Mike Orton, Lead Councillor for Community Care, said: "I'm am extremely pleased to see that for the fifth year running our services have been given the thumbs up by the commission by the awarding of one-star. Only 19 councils out of 150 get a one star award and I think these consistent results are a fitting tribute to the way I lead the department."

A member of the commission told us: "You shouldn't read too much into our future predictions. We had to mark Reading's capacity to improve as 'promising'. You can't get any lower than their current rating without a town being a complete basket case."

Reading Borough Council has issued a press release in response to news that Ashford in Kent has started operating what they claim is the first major 'shared space' project in the UK. Drivers no longer have the right of way on the Ashford ring road. Instead cars, bikes and pedestrians have equal priority. Kerbs, crossings and four sets of traffic lights have been removed from a mile-long section of the road bordering the town centre. Pedestrians and cyclists must use eye contact to work out when to cross the street or give way to oncoming traffic.

An RBC spokesman told us: "We've been operating such a 'shared space' project for years in Broad Street! Cyclists and pedestrians have been 'allowed' to co-exist without fear of being stopped by the police... but we hadn't thought of extending it to cars as well. What a great idea!"

It seems an unwillingness to admit the fact that Labour no longer runs the council runs far deeper than a piss-poor leaflet from Anneliese Dodds.

Callers to the number published in the council's Residents' Guide to Local Councillors & Services for Lib Dem Katesgrove councillor Warren Swaine will find themselves connected instead to local librarian David Sutton.

It's been 6 months. RBC staff should really get over it!!!

Long serving former Lib Dem councillor Bob Green was honoured by Reading after being made a Freeman of the Borough at a ceremony in the council chamber. The political groupings took it in turns to praise the former Lib Dem group leader and tell the same joke about Lib Dem amendments to motions. However, proceedings were livened up when, standing in for Tory leader Andrew Cumpsty, Tom Steele read out a poem to the council:

Roses are red, violets are blue
And apart from Bob Green, Lib Dems are poo.

Bob will now have the right to drive sheep over Caversham Bridge, but he told us: "I won't be exercising that right. I think the Tory Councillors should make their own way to council meetings."

Reading has won a prestigious industry award for transport innovation, thanks to its cutting-edge transport communication system. Reading's entry was centred around the Council's SEEDA-sponsored £1.8million trial which uses emerging WiMAX wireless communications technology, in combination with Wi-Fi and the latest mobile phone 3G communications services.

Lead councillor for transport Tony Page, told the press: "This cutting edge system will be a welcome new revenue stream, er, boon to the traveller. Before this system people would be stuck waiting for a bus or in traffic with all the uncertainty of no end in sight. Now they'll be able at the touch of a button to know for certain that there is no end in sight and that they should consider getting out and walking. Who said that you couldn't make money out of people's misery?"

The two users of the system were very impressed.

Martin Salter has come out in support of legislation currently going through Parliament but looks to be heading for a clash with local Labour Party colleagues over his backing for the Reading Borough Council Bill. Speaking in support of the Bill he said: "Illegal peddling is a dangerous menace which can put people at risk of being ripped off with faulty merchandise with no right of redress or compensation for being cheated by false promises."

However, a Labour insider told us that they are worried about the irreparable damage passing this bill could do to prospective parliamentary candidate Anneliese Dodds at the next election. One activist told us: "If we can't peddle door to door our broken promises and faulty policies without falling foul of the law, we're screwed."

The Grade II listed King's Meadows swimming baths were yesterday destroyed in a mystery arson attack. Campaigners have fought for many years to keep the structure, one of the last of its kind, preserved as a public building. However, like the fomer listed brewery which also was destroyed in a mysterious fire, the King's Meadows pool is now thought to be beyond economic repair and will be sold to developers.

"This is terrible news," laughed a Council spokesman. "The King's Meadows pool was much loved by all in the town, I can only hope that the hotel and marina complex that will be built to replace it for the benefit of rich yacht owners will be of some comfort to the residents of Reading."

Note to Editors: This story is embargoed until required.

Reading Transport chiefs are planning to announce their most ambitious plan yet.

A planned upgrade of the notorious twin bridge bottle neck at Cow Lane will help speed traffic towards the Labour Party's proposed new bus lane congestion zone at Caversham Road. However, enterprising council bosses have come up with an ingenious scheme to take drivers minds of the jams by upgrading the rail track to incorporate a loop the loop.

"We think the new train loop will put the ding back into Reading and passengers waiting for a platform can look forward to hours of amusement."

As a public service we decided to check on the official line on democracy in Reading and what do you know, just what we suspected - local democracy is broken!

Tell us something new.