Salter's Law has passed onto the statute books making the possession of sexually violent images a criminal offence. Frothing at the mouth he told an expectant press: "Have you seen some of these images? They are pure filth. They could warp impressionable minds, who may be turned on by just one glimpse. Yeah, give it to me baby. The stop word is 'banana'. Hit me harder, harder!!! You can take off that gimp mask now Jo."

The new law which can see a person imprisioned for up to three years for possession of something that is perfectly legal to make is just the tip of the iceberg in Salter's campaign to clean up the internet. The Impure Thoughts Act will soon be making it's way through the House of Commons backed by Salter which will make it a criminal offence to question online the motives of Labour peers trousering money in exchange for making laws, publicly stating that Gordon Brown isn't Superman, and reminding people that he didn't vote against the war in Iraq, voted for Post Office closures and went AWOL during a commons debate on Gaza when he told people he was going to be there.